L-O-V-E
L-O-V-E, this is perhaps the most complicated word in the entire dictionary. People have spent their entire life trying to figure the meaning, people live their lifes without experiencing it, people have the tendency to take it for granted. To me, it's a third of what people need to obtain ‘幸福’， or what is called 'happiness', 'bliss', whatever.
There are three types of love, in my viewpoint, that exists in this world of ours, and most of us would need all three.
1) Religious love
I'm sure this is not stranger to a lot of my fans and readers. But to be a bit more clear, it can be rephrased as spiritual love, love from whoever you believe. This I think I dun need to explain too much about it, since I'm not an expert and the last thing I want is my friends coming to me and start all those debates again.
2) BGR
Okay..., I know this is lame, but it's true for most people, unless you tonsured and become a monk or hermit. Of course it can be BBR or GGR, but I'm not going to go into that. I'm sure a lot of people, in fact, by now would have some idea how it is like. And though I have no such experience, I must say that this is really essential, since Man is such an emotional creature. This is the kind of love which may make or break a person, create or destroy his/her life. For me, for a normal BGR to go smoothly and succeed, both must fulfll four criteria, or at least try to fulfill all:
i) Accept thy weaknesses and shortcomings
It is necessary that you must accept what you are before you can accept other people. If not, I won't even call you a human being at all.
ii) Accept thy mate's weaknesses and shortcomings
Sounds 'duh' but it's something which often break couples up. In a beginning of a relationship, both parties will be blinded by emotions and what they thought is love and they bascially just try to hide their shortcomings. As times goes, these shortcomings begin to emerge and I must admit, this may prove a test to the relationship. Yet, I must emphasize, if you can see a trait which you deem as shortcoming in another person, then most likely you are shortcoming in that trait too. I have tested this theory in almost everyone I meet, and I obtained a probably 99.99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999% consistency. If you dun believe me, try spending half a day or so and reflect upon yourself. The logic for this is simple: if you have a certain shortcoming, for eg, arrogance, subconsiously, you will know it and you will tend to look out for the same trait in another person. A instinctive act by the mind for re-assurance. That's why I have put (i) and (ii) as the first two criteria. Cos if you can't accept yourself, how are you going to accept others?
iii) Trust
Of course, trust is a very important factor in every relationship. But in a BGR, it proves to be even more important and it really tests both parties' sense of security toward each other. This I dun think I need to talk much about it cos I know you will understand where I'm getting at.
iv) Listen
The skill of listening is also essential. They say that the reason why we have two ears and one mouth is so that we listen more than we talk. And when I say listen, it means listen, not just hearing. It makes a great difference listening to another person and hearing another perosn. Listening includes understanding annd empathising. Sometimes, there is no need to say anything since people normally just want someone close to them to listen to what they wanna say.
3) True love
A.K.A Agape in greek, it means the love for any other man around us. It's the human to human love that I'm talking about. It's the unconditional love that man has for each other. I think I you understand what I'm talking, and I won't be going too much deep into this topic.
So that sorta concludes my 'theory of love' lecture. I dun know what you all may think, so you may wanna post your viewpoints on my tagboard while I figure out how to get my comments section out. Hope I sorta gave you all something to take home with, and to be frank, I'm not a love expert, but the above are proven and tested theories over time, and not just my ideas alone (I do know what I am posting). I hope that I dun sound like a 'know-it-all' to others, though I know, from some friends, that sometimes I tend to be a bit 'act act'.
Till then, I need to rest. Too much thing to think about. Euthyphro and Esler and Leifer and... god knows who.
There are three types of love, in my viewpoint, that exists in this world of ours, and most of us would need all three.
1) Religious love
I'm sure this is not stranger to a lot of my fans and readers. But to be a bit more clear, it can be rephrased as spiritual love, love from whoever you believe. This I think I dun need to explain too much about it, since I'm not an expert and the last thing I want is my friends coming to me and start all those debates again.
2) BGR
Okay..., I know this is lame, but it's true for most people, unless you tonsured and become a monk or hermit. Of course it can be BBR or GGR, but I'm not going to go into that. I'm sure a lot of people, in fact, by now would have some idea how it is like. And though I have no such experience, I must say that this is really essential, since Man is such an emotional creature. This is the kind of love which may make or break a person, create or destroy his/her life. For me, for a normal BGR to go smoothly and succeed, both must fulfll four criteria, or at least try to fulfill all:
i) Accept thy weaknesses and shortcomings
It is necessary that you must accept what you are before you can accept other people. If not, I won't even call you a human being at all.
ii) Accept thy mate's weaknesses and shortcomings
Sounds 'duh' but it's something which often break couples up. In a beginning of a relationship, both parties will be blinded by emotions and what they thought is love and they bascially just try to hide their shortcomings. As times goes, these shortcomings begin to emerge and I must admit, this may prove a test to the relationship. Yet, I must emphasize, if you can see a trait which you deem as shortcoming in another person, then most likely you are shortcoming in that trait too. I have tested this theory in almost everyone I meet, and I obtained a probably 99.99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999% consistency. If you dun believe me, try spending half a day or so and reflect upon yourself. The logic for this is simple: if you have a certain shortcoming, for eg, arrogance, subconsiously, you will know it and you will tend to look out for the same trait in another person. A instinctive act by the mind for re-assurance. That's why I have put (i) and (ii) as the first two criteria. Cos if you can't accept yourself, how are you going to accept others?
iii) Trust
Of course, trust is a very important factor in every relationship. But in a BGR, it proves to be even more important and it really tests both parties' sense of security toward each other. This I dun think I need to talk much about it cos I know you will understand where I'm getting at.
iv) Listen
The skill of listening is also essential. They say that the reason why we have two ears and one mouth is so that we listen more than we talk. And when I say listen, it means listen, not just hearing. It makes a great difference listening to another person and hearing another perosn. Listening includes understanding annd empathising. Sometimes, there is no need to say anything since people normally just want someone close to them to listen to what they wanna say.
3) True love
A.K.A Agape in greek, it means the love for any other man around us. It's the human to human love that I'm talking about. It's the unconditional love that man has for each other. I think I you understand what I'm talking, and I won't be going too much deep into this topic.
So that sorta concludes my 'theory of love' lecture. I dun know what you all may think, so you may wanna post your viewpoints on my tagboard while I figure out how to get my comments section out. Hope I sorta gave you all something to take home with, and to be frank, I'm not a love expert, but the above are proven and tested theories over time, and not just my ideas alone (I do know what I am posting). I hope that I dun sound like a 'know-it-all' to others, though I know, from some friends, that sometimes I tend to be a bit 'act act'.
Till then, I need to rest. Too much thing to think about. Euthyphro and Esler and Leifer and... god knows who.
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