Refraction... or reflection

I just recently got back my term papers, and I found out that I'm not getting the grades my efforts entail. What went wrong? And why? Am I working too hard? Am I working too stupid for a start? What is lacking in me that is causing all these problems? Is it because I'm not working smart enough? Is it because after two and a half years of vacation, I'm losing touch in doing academic work, though I think it's all BS? Well, time to change my approach towards my studies now.

The experience from these past few days dawned upon me that the four letters L.O.V.E can be far more complicated than I thought it is. I have always understood that L.O.V.E is complicated and have always convinced that it's not as simple as the four letters. In fact, these four letters may be the most mathematically complicated permutation of the English alphabet ever known to man. In Chinese terms, the word ‘爱’ is the most difficult character which Chinese themselves never seem to be able to define properly. There are manuals written about these four letters but never has one managed to grasp the whole topic. Man has died for these four letters and women has cried for these too. The difficulty in understanding love probed human beings to search for all sorts of ways to attempt to explain the complex nature of this word. One such example is going to the extent of studying horoscopes, which a few of my friends do so faithfully. Not that I'm saying horoscope is useless, considering I normally will research on my own horoscope - Aquarius, as I have done in my previous posts. But can horoscope really explain everything?

Sometimes, it's just so fascinating that our characters and personalities can be defined by the many little stars in the heaven. But just think about it, how can it be the case? How is it possible that people can come out with the hypothesis that we are affected and influenced by the movement of the stars? I'm in fact quite amused that I fulfill most of the characteristics of a typical Aquarius... although i have not really gone on to fully understand the other zodiacs. It's even more amusing to see my friends trying to fit themselves into the description of their own zodiac, IMO.

So what's my take? IMO, relationships depend strongly number one on fate, or what the chinese called '缘'. It really depends on fate for two person to meet up and fall in 'love'. If not for fate, how can it be that some people see each other for years bu dun know each other's name and there can be people who just met and get to become very good friends or lovers? But fate can only work till 'the meeting and becoming lovers or friend' part. As the Chinese always say '缘分,有缘无分', the '无分' part is because people dun make the effort to create it. '缘是上天赐的, 分是要自己找的' 50% from fate, 50% from self. It takes effort to make a relationship work, and it takes even more effort to make a relationship last. This is my explanation for the four letters.

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