Parable of the 'Good Samaritan'

Once there was this man traveling from Jerusalem to Jericho, and he fell among thorns, and the thorns spring up and choked him. And as he went on, he didn’t have money, and he met the Queen of Sheba, and she gave him 1,000 talents of gold and 100 changes of raiment. And he got into a chariot and drove furiously, and when he was driving under a big juniper tree, his hair caught on a limb of that tree, and he
hung there many days, and the ravens brought him food to eat and water to drink, and he ate 5,000 loaves of bread and two fishes.

One night when he was hanging there asleep, his wife Delilah came along and cut off his hair, and he dropped, and fell on stony ground. But he got up and went on, and it began to rain, and it rained forty days and forty nights, and he hid himself in a cave, and he lived on locust and wild honey.

Then he went on ‘til he met a servant who said, “Come, take supper at my house.” And he made an excuse and said, “No, I won’t. I have married a wife, and I can’t go.” And the servant went out in the highways and in the hedges and compelled him to come in.

After supper, he went on and came on down to Jericho. And when he got there, he looked up and saw old Queen Jezebel sitting down way up high in a window. And she laughed at him. And he said, “Throw her down again.” And they threw her down seventy times seven, and of the fragments that remained they picked up twelve baskets full, besides women and children. And they said, “Blessed are the piecemakers.” Now, whose wife do you think she will be in the Judgment Day?”

Comments

  1. Anonymous8:17 AM

    Hello, I heard apologist Ravi Zacharias once use this funny story. But he did not cite the source and I would just like to ask if this is something you wrote so I can mention it whenever I use it as an illustration. Thanks and God bless.

    - Richard

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I personally have not heard him say in all the sermons wher i have heard him say that joke. On understanding of popstmodernism, he says some genius wrote, so i don't know who wrote it.

      Delete
  2. Hi, unfortunately, i heard the story from Ravi Zacharias as well...

    ReplyDelete
  3. This is the full story that went around the Logan County titled:

    The Logan County Hill-Billy Preacher
    Let me tell you the story of the Logan County hill-billy
    that thought he was called to preach. When he spoke to the
    brethren at Church, they told him that he would have to submit to
    an examination, to which he readily agreed.
    "Brother Fraley, can you read," he was asked.

    "Yes, I can read readin', but I can't read writin'," was his
    answer.

    "Well, do you know your Bible?"

    "Yes, I shore 'nouf do; in fact, I am pretty good in the
    Bible. I know my Bible from lid to lid, from kivver to kivver,
    and from Generations to Revolutions."

    "What part of the Bible do ya like best?"

    "Well sir, I like the New Textamint."

    "What book then do ya like best?"

    "I like the book of Parables."

    "Which of the parables do you like best?"

    "I like the parable of the Good Cemeterian the best."

    "Well, tell us about the Good Samaritan."

    "Once upon a time a man went down from Jerusalem to Jericho
    and fell among thorns and they grew up and choked him. So he went
    on and didn't have any money and met the Queen of Sheba who gave
    him a thousand talents of gold earrings and 100 chances on a
    horse. He got into his chariot and drove furiously and while he
    was driving under a tree, his hair caught among the limbs and he
    hung there three days and three nights. The ravens brought him
    food to eat and water to drink. One night while he was hanging
    there, his wife came along and cut his hair, and he fell on the
    stony ground where it rained forty days and forty nights. He hid
    himself in a cave where he met a man who said 'come have supper
    with me' to whom he said 'I have married a wife and cannot come
    now.' So the man went into the highways and byways and compelled
    him to come and have supper with him. After supper, he went into
    Jericho and sitting in a high window was Jezebel. When she saw
    him, she laughed, and they flang her down from the window. And
    they flang her down, and they flang her down some more. They
    flang her down some more, until 70 times 70 and seven times more,
    and the fragments they picked up were 12 baskets shook down for
    good measure full. Now whose wife is she going to be in the
    judgment because she brake in pieces and multiplied? Amen and
    Hallelujah!"

    The examiners sat in silence for a few minutes. Finally one
    of them said, "These am some thoughtful delineations our brother
    has pronounced to us. I recommend that he be accepted unanimously
    as our new preacher, because he shore do know Bible from lid to
    lid, from kivver to kivver, and all about Generations clean
    through to Revolutions.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous8:21 AM

    Is this story on youtube? give me the link

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes. Look under Ravi Zacharias, How so we challenge this generation.

      Delete
  5. Thanks for the story, I needed it for a sermon I will be preaching soon.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I am happy to help. God bless you.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Maybe just listen to his message on Faith in the 21st century. It was quite good.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I shared Ravi's version here:
    https://soundcloud.com/justice4bass/contextual-analysis-at

    ReplyDelete
  9. Used it b4 to minister, quite funny, bt a lot to learn from

    ReplyDelete
  10. Found the joke on YouTube someone cut
    It out of the full video and posted it.

    http://youtu.be/-kV1roZnJ6c

    ReplyDelete
  11. Someone got the full joke and cut it out and posted it on YouTube so here is a link

    http://youtu.be/-kV1roZnJ6c

    ReplyDelete
  12. Thanks for this note..quite hard just taking notes from Ravi Zacharias preaching..need in my preaching. God bless everyone!

    ReplyDelete

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